Be KIDS again. Have a day at the park. Fly a kite. Swing from the monkey bars. Slide down the BIG slide. Push each other on swings. Ride a tandem bike. Have a picnic of all your favorite goodies. And don’t forget the blanket.
Rather than focusing on trying to connect or disconnect from your partner, it’s important to learn to breathe and reconnect with yourself first before taking any action.
Underneath the dark shadows cast by fear, is the light of love. Look to see the LIGHT in yourself and in your partner. Connection is then close at hand.
Before building into an argument, or going on auto pilot when issues arise, it is wise to take a pause. Here’s how to take a PAUSE IN A HEALTHY WAY: “You gave me a lot to think about and look at. Can we talk later after I let it all settle in?” It’s important to…
When our partner is ‘activated’ it’s easy to get our buttons pushed and go off our own deep end. When the emotional waves get rough, it is vital that the least activated partner remain steady and hold onto the BIGGER RELATIONSHIP PICTURE. When your partner is drowning, throw your partner a life raft, don’t jump…
For a relationship to thrive it’s important to stay OPEN and in regular intimate contact with each other. This includes sharing both your wows and your woes.
When your partner is upset Do you know 3 or 4 things that will help your partner calm down, feel safe, and feel most loved? Do you know what soothes your partner? Knowing ahead of time the particular statement that connects with your lover’s heart, a certain move or touch that immediately soothes, not only…
Often when we are in emotional distress we automatically fall back into primal survival patterns of response. Fight (criticize, push away), flight (get me out of here now!) or freeze (shut down, wall up). The next time this happens, pause, step back, take a few deep, conscious breaths and then do the exact opposite of…
When you find yourself anxious or upset about something your partner did or didn’t do, STOP and take a 15- 30 minute break with a specific goal to first release the anxiety and tension and reconnect with yourself BEFORE attempting any problem- solving ‘let’s fix this’ conversations.
Kisses are the food of love. A loving embrace of the lips. Wordlessly, kisses say many things.”Welcome home.” “I cherish you.” “I’m yours.” “I’m sorry.” ” I’m here for you.” A kiss can lift the level of the moment from barren and ordinary to loving and intimately extraordinary. So, kiss and BE KISSED regularly. Try…
